Any new parents knows that there’s a lot of people that will scare the hell out of you. Birthing classes find ways to scare you. Other parents find ways to scare you. The internet finds a million ways to scare you. Basically, it all boils down to the fact that if you do something (or not do something) it will somehow mean an increase chance that your baby will die.
It’s very difficult to be a parent knowing that most of the decisions you face will lead to this increased risk. Here are a couple areas that they scare the hell out of…
SIDS – Sudden Infant Death Syndrome:
This is a serious issue and because of great education to the masses, the rate of SIDS has decreased drastically. However, there’s basically research showing that you can’t do anything without increasing the risk. Stunning was reading through some information about acid reflux babies in information provided to her by a lactation specialist. Well, reflux babies have a higher rate of SIDS. WHY WOULD YOU HAVE THIS IN THERE?!? People are reading this information because their kids have this and there’s little that can be done about it, but thanks for making us think about the fact that SIDS can happen because of it.
Then there’s people on the internet. We were researching the idea of supplementing with formula at night and breastfeeding during the day. We ran across a Yahoo! Answers where someone said a baby would sleep better at night with formula since they don’t get as hungry as fast. This was a response:
Babies aren't supposed to sleep through the night, this increases risk of SIDS. Definitely do not let them sleep more than five hours at a time.
Thanks. (By the way, the formula made him sleep no longer at night.)
Breastfeeding versus Formula:
I’m with people that breastfeeding is awesome. It makes sense that the thing babies need most would be in the milk refined for thousands and thousands of years. However, sometimes, such as our case, it doesn’t work… and people need to use formula. WOW! Search the internet to see what moms have to say about this. Basically, if you give formula… your baby will be ADHD, dumb, unlikely to succeed in life, your bad parents for not giving breastmilk, your lazy, your baby will grow up to wear his hat backwards, and anything else that could go wrong will go wrong.
There are other areas, like the carseat, germs, etc that have the same fear mongering associated with it. It really makes parenting more difficult as you might imagine. So far though, I’m happy to report Junior is still alive.
5 comments:
When my daughter was born, our pedi told us. "This is your baby, you raise it how you want to raise it. If you screw up on some things, you screw up on some things. Don't let anyone tell you how to raise your kid."
April 13, 2010 at 4:55 AMWe go to the internets for info if the a kid is sick or presenting some sort of condition and we confirm it, but I'm okay that my kids wear their hat backwards from time to time.
Love this post. So true that EVERYONE has an opinion on what is right. When I was a baby I slept on my tummy and I didn't die in my sleep. And oh yeah, I think my mom started feeding me cow's milk at 6 months too. Surprisingly I didn't die and I'm not a moron or chronically sick all the time.
April 13, 2010 at 5:24 AMYou just need to what is best for your situation and disregard the critics because they aren't in your situation.
Amelia never had a drop of breast milk and I got a lot of flak about that from people OTHER than medical staff "Are you sure you don't just want to try?" "NO IF I WANTED TO, I WOULD BE". Our parents' generation was all fed formula, back then it was considered unhealthy to be breast fed. Gee, somehow our parents' generation continues to function just fine.
April 13, 2010 at 7:07 AMIt is your baby like Eric said, I told Molly at her shower, you will hear a lot of advice and a lot of how to and a lot of opinions. But ultimately, this is your baby, and ultimately what works for one family unit with their baby will not work for another.
You love Jack, you cherish him, you protect him. That's your job as a parent.
I agree with you fathers. You are the parent and you have to raise your baby in the way that you think is best for your child. But, don't you want to take advantage of the latest research in child development? Yes, it's true that babies are not intended to sleep thru the night. Waking up is the one biological defense that our otherwise defensely infants have to survival - wake up and cry to be cared for.
April 13, 2010 at 8:19 AM(Sorry tired parents).
Susie, of course you slept on your tummy. Most everyone did during the 20th century in the western world. But, there were 7000 babies dying a year due to SIDS. By flipping a baby on to his or her back, the number drops to 2200 babies. Amazing! Pretty simple.
I'd also guess that you weren't in a car seat nor did you wear a bike helmet. I even played on construction sites and drank water out of a garden hose. I'm alive and well.
But, not everyone is. These advancement in technology and research make it possible to have fewer deaths.
You're the parent, you get to decide. There are more tools in your parenting tool box than at any other time in history. Use them or not. You'll probably be one of the lucky ones - but if not, there's probably a support group for you.
"You're the parent, you get to decide. There are more tools in your parenting tool box than at any other time in history. Use them or not. You'll probably be one of the lucky ones - but if not, there's probably a support group for you."
April 13, 2010 at 8:24 PMPam--That last snarky comment of yours proves the whole point I think that people were trying to make. There is a lot of criticism if things are not done in the way that people believe is the RIGHT way. I'm not talking about sleeping on stomach...but I'm sorry, at 3 days old my daughter slept 4.5 hours before waking up once, and I slept right through it. Should I feel guilty about this? Should I feel glad that I didn't need a SUPPORT GROUP?
that last comment? totally uncalled for. that last comment actually made me feel ill and hope that you don't have some sort of degree because to think that someone with any level of education could make that sort of comment, makes me shudder to think of the state of higher education. And yes, I can capitalize and do correct punctuation when I choose to but as this is an online format, rules of grammar are relaxed a bit.
The LAST thing a parent who has a child who suffers from something wants to hear is that if they don't follow all the rules out there that hopefully there is a support group for them.
A lot of times, SIDS deaths happen with no known cause. The baby woke up every 2 or 3 hours, they slept flat on their back with no crib decorations, nothing in the crib with them. I too have done my research. Your little snarky comment means that any parent who has lost a child to SIDS that comes across it might feel guilt that they let their baby sleep 4.5 hours one time, when they might not have woken up in order to wake up their child.
Uncalled for, shame on you. I hope you got some heady sense of ego rush from typing that because it's about the only good thing that would have come out of that comment.
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